In the Song of Solomon we see a beautiful model for marriage. Although the husband was a king, the dominant relationship with his wife was that of love rather than authority. The wife clearly recognizes her husband’s headship, but it was a headship clothed in love and mutual respect.
“Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. He has brought me to his banquet hall, and his banner over me is love” (Song 2:3-4). A banner was a public announcement, in this case an announcement of the king’s love for his wife which he wanted to proclaim to the world. She not only had the security of hearing him tell her of his love but of hearing him tell the world of that love.
“Sustain me with raisin cakes, refresh me with apples, because I am lovesick. Let his left hand be under my head and his right hand embrace me” (Song 2:5-6). Her husband was her willing and eager protector, provider, and lover. Solomon responded by saying to her, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come along. For behold, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone” (Song 2:10-11). Spring had come and his only thoughts were for his beloved.
There was no hint of authoritativeness or superiority, but only love, respect, and concern for the welfare, joy, and fulfillment of his wife. She expressed the deep mutuality of their relationship in the expression, “My beloved is mine, and I am his” (v. 16) and later, “This is my beloved and this is my friend” (Song 5:16).
*Content from MacArthur New Testament Commentary: Ephesians